YOLO - Are you using it right?

YOLO: You Only Live Once, right? That's the story that's being told to the youth of America today. Although, I suppose it all depends on your religion and beliefs, but yes, I guess you really do only live once. With that in mind, are you using YOLO correctly?

A saying that's been around for years, but has only been popularized recently by Drake, YOLO has quickly become the vernacular of every bro, hoe and schmoe you know, but when is it appropriate and necessary to use YOLO? Here are some situations you might find yourself in and how to properly respond:

SITUATION #1:
A friend of yours just won two tickets to Peru, a complete packaged deal that includes flight, hotel and activities like zip-lining. You have a great fear of flying and large bugs and even though most of the trip is paid for, you don't have much money, but you know the trip will do you good and it sounds like an amazing time.

YOLO?:
This would be a definite yes. You're being offered the chance of a life time. How could you not YOLO?

SITUATION #2:
It's late on a Saturday night. You and your friends have been out for hours living it up, dancing, drinking, making attempted passes at people and getting rejected. It's the end of the night and your buddy looks at you and says "Dude, let's do a shot." At this point you've already had quite a bit to drink and you just remembered you're supposed to have brunch with your parents.

YOLO?:
I wouldn't recommend it. While it seems like you could die tomorrow, would you really regret not having that last shot? Probably not. Don't get greedy.

SITUATION#3:
A group from work is going out for lunch. They ask you if you want to get Chipotle. You know that eating it will leave you in a monumental pain from the gas tornado churning in your bowels and you have a very important meeting with your boss right after lunch, but you really love yourself a good burrito bowl.

YOLO?:
The fact that you're considering using YOLO for this situation proves you are not yet ready for it's ultimate power. You'll live without the Chipotle...probably longer.

SITUATION #4:
You're at a party your best friend is throwing. It's been a while since you've gotten laid and you're thinking tonight is the night. You meet a guy who seems slightly interesting, at least interesting enough to sleep with, and as the night goes on it becomes abundantly clear that sex is on. Before the night is over he confesses that he has crabs, but if you don't mind, he'll still do it.

YOLO?:
If this is an actual situation that you're planning on using YOLO for, then we should discuss your priorities. Sure, you only live once, but you'll have to change your saying to YOLOWC: You only live once with crabs. Don't be an idiot. And incase you need help, this is not a YOLO situation.

SITUATION #5:
You're in line at Walgreen's and you need gum. You usually chew peppermint, but they only have spearmint.

YOLO?
No...just, no. This is not a YOLO situation. You did not make some ultimate decision that's going to impact your life forever. You were left with an option and you took it. This does not make you mightier, it does not make you a lifer and it doesn't make you adventurous. I want you to stand in front a mirror and ask yourself, "What is my life?" Then I want you buy the spearmint gum and chew so much of it that you can never speak again.

Take these situations and see how they apply to your life. With these answers, you can now go out into the world with the confidence of a person who knows how to use YOLO. God speed, because remember, you only live all the time.